redbud,
i am sorry for your frustration dealing with medical people.
is your son going to a military hospital?
is he or has he applied for disability?
maybe going to a patient advocate at the hospital will help you and the medical people talk to each other.
does he have any representation? say the disabled veterans of america to help with his claim?
it is not right, and it is not fair for you to have your son come back with a traumatic brain injury and leave you holding the bag (empty).
you are strong and you can do this.
there is a lot of information online too. check the forums, there are thousands of veterans out there with the knowledge you need to help your son.
Beth