Originally Posted by
GettingBy 
He has used that tactic for so long... And in the past, it's worked. I continually found myself apologizing even when I did nothing wrong.
Not this time. I know the truth and I will not accept any blame for his actions.
Good for you!
I go thru it all the time, especially now that I'm trying to set boundaries and stand up for myself. I'm still working on JADE (Justify, Argue, Defend, Explain) & I still (I wish I didn't) kinda hope he'll realize what these last 8 years has done to me and get it together. So now we're separated and he wants to discuss "how things got this way again" and of course, I'm crazy and delusional with my version of events. Some days I'm good at just hanging up the phone but some days, and its true about HALT (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired) he gets me going and next thing you know I'm screaming and having an anxiety attack.
It's a One Day at a Time Program -- Progress not Perfection -- At least I know what it is he doing so I can work on keeping me sane.