GHW, you know I'm a total newb too & relapsed last week, BUT something really useful happened. I wrote down in a journal how I felt WHILE I was sobbingly, sickeningly drunk, & what I can read of it isn't pretty. I also made myself write an honest appraisal the next morning of the fear, the guilt, the sweats, the sheer toecurling SHAME etc etc I felt. Haven't needed to look at it 'cos feeling no urge to drink at all at the moment, but I'm glad I have it. As others have noted I think what will keep me straight is avoiding romanticzing my drinking. Scribble with vomit spots should help....
NOT suggesting you try this!!! But maybe a written list of why its important to be sober. Also have the Steps prayers 1-3 & morning/evening so far in the back for easy reference & will add as I go.
Peace to all