Originally Posted by
cynical one 
This would be a good place to start on YOUR recovery. Figure out why you attract and are attracted to guys who are emotionally unavailable and/or abusive. IMO, we don’t end up in these toxic relationships by happenstance, they fulfill an unhealthy need within us.
I strongly recommend the book Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them by Dr. Susan Forward. It's all about codependent women who love emotionally and psychologically abusive men. It has good self help advice.