It helps me to remember that every time I got drunk it was because I picked up a glass. It was my decision and my will. Fortunately it's my will today to not drink one day at a time.
It doesn't sound like you'll go to "any lengths to get sober" at this point. Do you understand that it's only today we don't drink or take drugs? It's just today. But staying sober involves turning my will over (in my case the rooms of AA). Getting a sponsor, a meeting per day, every day talking to another alcoholic. The saying was "my best thinking got me in here".