I wanted to add....
I know with this process, of "waking up" there's going to be pain.
There will be mood swings. There may even be physical pain.
I guess it could be called the codie's withdrawl process.
I'm addicted to the addictive thinking. And suddenly I'm not thinking that way anymore. It's like someone dropped me on my head and I developed amnesia. (or something like that)
I have a long painful process ahead of me, becuase every painful emotion I never allowed myself to feel before, I'm feeling now. But atleast I am feeling them, because then I can get passed them once and for all.
and it really helps knowing I'm not going through it alone.