It's a simple rule...
...anybody can attend an Alanon meeting who wants to do so. However, Alanon meetings are for sharing about Alanon issues, not AA issues or anything else. The focus in an Alanon meeting is Alanon-- people affected by somebody else's drinking.
It is not necessary, in any way, shape, or form to identify yourself as an alcoholic-- that's not what Alanon is about. There are many people in Alanon who are alcoholics. It's a non-issue.
So, if you share at the Alanon meeting you share about your issues related to why you are at an Alanon meeting, not your AA issues. Those are for AA. Just like an Alanon at an AA meeting shouldn't share about Alanon issues.
I hope this helps.
Cyranoak