Originally Posted by
OklaBH 
Yeah...perhaps I should get a sponsor. I read on the internet about recovery and post on here. Time to get real.
This is exactly how I feel... it's time to get real with my recovery. I had been going to a couple meetings here and there and coming here and doing internet research, and I did have some improvement but I'm still a mess. I just decided the other day to get serious. I got a sponsor and I'm going to really get in to the program. Too soon to speak of results, but I feel so much better with a real plan of action that I'm carrying out. I really feel like I have hope.
I'm sorry you're hurting so much, but I think the best way to heal your relationships and resentments is to GET SOBER FOR REAL! I'm willing to bet that with time and sobriety your relationships will heal. And if not, at least you'll be sober and better able to deal with it.
Best of luck to us both!