I need some advice!
I have spent a good deal of time reading away on this site and feel I have a very strange situation that I need some advice on.
My wife and I have been married for 14 years and we have 4 great kids, great careers, nice house, etc, etc. Except we have a dirty secret: my wife struggles with alcohol. We have never had any marital problems! No drugs, no cheating, honesty, etc. However, in the last few years a problem continues to grow and get worse.
My wife seems to have "episodes" where she drinks too much and basically acts like a fool. Just a few examples would be she has drank to the point of vomitting, she has gotten drunk and cursed/stumbled around our kids (only a couple times), she drinks until passes out, she has on occassion hid the drinking from me. This has happened probably 6 or 7 times in the last 6 months, and probably 20 times in the last 2 years. It really is to the point where our kids are getting older and notice, and I as her spouse can't deal with the occassional lapse in judgement, and/or share a bed with a spouse who is passed out. Here is an example of the last situation. Saturday night, dinner at our home with our neighbors. We all had a couple drinks and a potluck style dinner. By the end of night, I had noticed an empty bottle of vodka, and know my wife probably drank 2/3 of it. She was drunk, stumbling/happy style drunk, I had a couple drinks and was fine. She comes to bed naked, my thought was she didn't want me mad at her for drinking too much so she came prepared for bedtime. 30 seconds after crawling into bed she is passed out cold. Shaking, I cover her up and let her sleep it off. I stayed awake for 2 hours worried about her.
I have tried to get her to quit, I myself would too. I have tried yelling, talking, begging, writing letters to her and I just can't get through to her that this is just to the point of no return with me and I need her to get help.
Other background, her mother was an alcoholic--but gave my wife up for adoption at birth so there is some family history of abuse. She grew up on a farm with no alcohic issues. She is an AVID runner completing 2 marathons per year. She has a great career. She drinks maybe once a week and like a said one time it always goes too far. She is outstanding in so many things she does in her life, but she can't seem to get a handle on the situational drink too much episode.
Thoughts?