Welcome, and I second the suggestion you get to some Al-Anon meetings right away. As you can see from this forum, you are far from alone in dealing with these kinds of situations. Al-Anon will not only make you feel that you are with others who understand, but it will help you clear your own thought and feelings so you can make good decisions for yourself and your kids.
It is very hard to let go of the dreams of the life we thought we were going to have, but if we are to live we have to deal with reality, not keep chasing dreams. Nobody asks for a spouse to develop a progressive, fatal disease. That's what alcoholism is. There is hope, there is treatment, but the alcoholic must want it more than anything. We can do what's right for ourselves, we can learn how to stop enabling the disease, but we can't make the choice of sobriety for the alcoholic. That has to come from within.