I remember last year, I completely agonized over my first family dinner....Easter. I asked what i could bring and brought along a bottle of seltzer for me and some flavored teas.
no one made a big deal, everyone respected my wishes, i just mentioned in passing that i had stopped drinking for health reasons, it was not helping my BP and meds.
I made it into a big deal, no one else did.
your wife probably mentioned it to her family and no one wanted to make you uncomfortable since you are obviously not ready to discuss with them...don't read too much into it....congrats on your 43-44 days. I hope you feel better today.