"Yeah, sure. Like all you said, ACTIONS."
Is this being said with sarcasm or frustration? Either way, I'm not sure you get what everyone's trying to tell you here. YOU'VE GOT A PROBLEM! What are you going to do about it? Remain sleeping? Continue to rant here. Boy, that'll solve everything. You asked for help and we're trying our best, but you just don't seem to want to hear what we're saying.
One more time for possible comprehension. Stop with the "poor me" stuff about how your wife actions make you feel bad. There's no right or wrong here. Get over it. There's nothing you can do to change the way she feels. She apparently has her own set of issues, Mark has said it several times, as have I and just about everyone else, DO SOMETHING!
You have not said a word about what you're going to do to solve your, and I mean your, problem. Stop living in that problem and start living in the solution. Go to AA or get involved with some other recovery program. Like we said, ACTIONS!