Hi reset,
Looks like your family know you are not drinking but may think you're practising control drinking and that's why the wine was offered at dinner.
It's good to hear they are being supportive and obviously care about you, maybe they're just waiting until you feel ready to tell them you know longer drink alcohol.
You must have a wonderful wife and in-laws....lucky you
Though no-one can go back and make a new start,
anyone can start from now and make a new ending.
Carl Bard.