My botton was when AH was verbally abusive to me in front of my 16 yr old daughter. It was pretty extensive and pretty bad.
I then discussed his drinking with my girls and realized they were more affected than I realized.
I am the child of pretty bad parental abuse. They weren't alcoholics, but were physically and emotionally abusive and very negligent.
I'm a mama bear with my children and if anything remotely abusive happens to them or in front of them, it's the end.