If their skills were so loveable and I don't have them, I must be unloveable, not good enough, not valuable. This comparison can come from others or I can generate myself. If either deny my issues or just strive to be enough. This happens often at work.
Healthy response: Let go of expecting myself to be like someone else. Accept my issues and limits and find means to support my success around my limitations.
I find it interesting that this shows up at work
This shows up for me at work a lot too. I've learned that a lot of it has to do with the culture in a particular workplace. It also has to do with the thoughts, actions and behaviors of the boss. I do not do well with bosses who see subordinates as people who they must control, people who are "less than," or there to serve them.
I have great difficulty with bosses who pass the buck and blame those who work in subordinate positions for what is not working. I could go on forever about this but the long and short of it for me is, wherever I FEEL there is toxicity, there is usually blame, shame and finger-pointing coming from someone, usually someone of "authority" in the workplace. All the usual mechanisms of sickness we deal with and talk about every day with alcoholics and drug addicts in our lives can also exist at work. (Is there no escape from this madness???
) Just because someone has a JOB, does not mean they are not SICK. Some bosses are not sick. Some are. I run from sick people.