Takes FULL responsibility for going down the road I went down.
After being raised in the German "You must self-deny" mentality, and then marrying into it in my first marriage, the wild hedonist came into my life and WOW!
What fun! No rules! Spend like crazy, deny yourself nothing, be an alcoholic in training, dance all night, have drunken sex all day, and indulge!
What did I give up? REALITY. WILLINGLY.
Now I'm painfully getting sober, financially, life's rules, Truths with a big T. I became a drunk too, although not an alcoholic one.
What a wild ride. If only so much pain wasn't attached to it. That's what happens when we don't live life truthfully on its terms, not ours.