Hi Kia, I hope you will take this in the spirit in which it's intended, and not as criticism.
I read your original post as you describing a triggering experience when your new guy opened some drinks.
I can completely imagine that because I have bad memories (even traumatic) from going out of town with AXH and he would buy beer on the way back to the hotel - always - and then we might argue or I would just go to sleep - lonely.
So for me, the scene you described would be way too close to what I am trying to move away from in my life, and I think people here were just pointing that out to you - that you should expect to be triggered by drinking, and that dates without alcohol can show you who you really are and who the guy really is instead of landing you in a hotel room.
I don't see it as criticism - I see it as you sharing a difficult experience and your f&f friends asking why you chose that situation for a date - when we all know what that kind of date (beer and hotels) usually means.
