Overwhelmed & needing support on my boundaries
I've posted about my recent break up with XABF and the fear I've dealt with surrounding it. The threats, harassment, and, insults have subsided as I stick to no contact, but I'm still really stressed. I'm doing a lot of work on myself, posting here, and reading some of the books suggested here. It's bringing up alot of strong feelings for me and my IRL friends don't understand. They think since he hasn't called at all in two days I should be happy and get on with my life. Meanwhile I'm still rushing with adrenaline with every creak of a floor board and tending to my young children who are acting out because of all the stress. Burnt out is putting my feelings mildly.
Anyway, all of a sudden drama seems to be popping up all around me and people seem to think I should be their shoulder to cry on.....
-My sister is having a nervous breakdown. Actually more of a psychotic break. She is suicidal and delusional. My whole family is rallying around her and expecting me to be there 100% for her. I love my sister, but I have spent my life with her telling me that she is much stronger because she was never depressed and I was. Or saying that mental illness is made up and I manufactured anxiety attacks to get attention. I wish! So now I'm in a ****** place emotionally and I just don't have it in me to be 100% supportive now that she concedes mental illness is real. Also (and I know how bitchy this sounds) I'm a bit pissed that my whole family is pampering her and sad since she wrote her kids good-bye suicide notes, but I'm all alone here writing good bye notes just in case he does snap and kill me.
-My mom called this morning and told me that my step father has cancer and I can't tell anyone. She told me 'cuz she needs my support.
-Good friends are going through an abuse/custody situation similar to one I experienced with XABF and his kids. They want my input, but it's bringing up some strong memories and realizations for me.
I am overwhelmed and need to set sane, healthy boundaries, but it is hard for me since my loved ones are having legitimate difficulties that family members normally do help with. Since I am very bad at setting boundaries I could use some help with what is appropriate in these situations. Thanks...it felt soooo good to write that all down.