Ironically, the husband I left for this man was a 'beer drunk' who never thought of himself as an alcoholic, but it sure seemed that way to me. He was also a mean drunk and was physically abusive and destroyed my self esteem in the process. When I met my partner, he was everything the husband was not and it was such a relief to be in a relationship where you could feel at ease and not be blamed for everything.
Who could have known that I was stepping right back into a very similar situation, not the physical abuse thank goodness, but the mean, nasty evil person he becomes when he's drinking is not something I could have ever foreseen.
In the meanwhile, I'm reading and learning from you all.