Thank you for your replies. It's very difficult, because any support we want to offer is likely to be met with resistance by her mother. Mum is in denial for the most part, and honestly believes that her behaviour does not affect her children (she also has a son, by another man). She doesn't think there's anything wrong with my stepdaughter being her 'mother', and will not accept any help offered for herself, let alone for her daughter. My stepdaughter also lives 20 miles away from us, and mum is reluctant, always, to allow contact outside of what has been ordered by the Courts (fortnightly weekend contact and half of school holidays), so even if my stepdaughter were interested in Al-Ateen, mum is very unlikely to agree to her going.
We are very concerned about the effects of this that are not yet apparent. Sadly, mum's father was alcoholic (he died from alcoholism), and 2 of her brothers are also alcoholic. I did a year's work at a local Rehab Centre a few years back, and am aware that there is a genetic link to alcoholism, so of course we are extremely worried that my stepdaughter could also take to drink. She's just 12, and when she hits 13, 14 years old and all those teenage hormones start coming with a vengeance, well, it doesn't need saying what could happen. We want to try and stem that, if possible, but it's very very difficult to get through to mum and if Social Services aren't concerned (why????), then they won't be offering support to the family either.
We fear this child could end up in a very dangerous situation, and feel powerless to do anything about it. Hopefully someone more UK based could offer advice here, but all advice and comments very gratefully received.
Thank you.