I am not sure but it seems that we wait for the crazy behavior and almost crave it because we are codependent. Craziness and controlling the craziness is our focus as codependents. It gives us purpose. We are forever in "survival mode" and I think that is incredibly hard to shut off. As others have posted here, it took us a long time to get where we are and it will take a long time to "re-program" ourselves. Plus, I think we look for the trigger and get frustrated when it isn't there.
I for one have absolutely no clue yet how I will be able to shut off my survival mode and my addiction to craziness of alcoholics. All I know is that I must do it so I can lead a more peaceful life.