I can relate to your story, too. As reggie so aptly put it:
I can't tell you how many times I wasn't going to drink at 9am and ended up drunk by 9pm. That is the disease of alcoholism.
I always knew I'd quit "someday." But it seemed like things were getting worse, not better. Finally I asked myself "what 'someday' are you waiting for? It's not going to get any easier - so why not now?"
I understand about justifying the beer, too - it's all about finding ways/reasons to tell ourselves it's OK to continue. Did that for years and years!
Glad you're here - hope you'll give sobriety another try!
