My ex-husband is sober, but he still has many of the traits/behaviors I *thought* were due to the drinking.
Selfishness
Immaturity
Irresponsibility
Selfishness
Did I mention selfishness?
Anyway, it was only after he got sober that I could truly see that he was not what I wanted in a life partner.
It seems that you have told her her behavior is not okay with you, yet she continues. That leaves it up to you to decide what to do. I'm sorry I can't share a more positive experience.
L