Welcome corkel!
We're glad you decided to post. I also lurked for a LONG time before I posted. We all know exactly what you're going through. Mine didn't do the online dating thing but the alcohol and insanity were enough to deal with. My divorce was final in Jan. 2010. As sad as that is it was the absolute best thing I could have done for myself. We were married six years and it was always a circle of crazy. I wish that the first time I considered divorce I had gone through it. I would have saved myself a lot more misery.
Besides coming here I go to my local AlAnon meeting. It is a wonderful source of support. I am not the meeting type of gal but I definitely need to be there.
Keep coming back. We're glad you're here.