Old 01-15-2011, 10:26 AM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Lushwell
Ozone Ranger
 
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Dazed and confused
Posts: 138
One practice I've found that helps when I'm struck with the "oh sh_t, whadda I do or say now" paralysis is to simply give it the attention it is due. I own it. Right there in front of God and everybody. Ever try to change something you deny having? That's what you are trying to do when you tell yourself not to be scared. "Hi. I'm Uncle Lushwell. I've spoke before, but lately I find I'm uncomfortable speaking and I need to own that, so it doesn't fight for center stage. I'm worried that I may not have anything useful to share. That my experience might not be useful. I really only have one thing to tell, and that is that I found a way out of where I once was, and have managed not to go back to that lifestyle. It is my truth, and I want to report how that happened, in spite of my fear and discomfort. Please bear with me as I take that fear on."

And I report my truth. It has never failed me. If the discomfort / fear returns, I own it. It is a progressive growing experience. It is an irrational fear that we can confront and overcome. I found that my discomfort evaporated when I focused on telling the truth as I saw it, and see it today, rather on a unique delivery method that had entertainment value. Sometimes it helps to examine our motives. AA speaking allows us growth in areas we may never have reason to address otherwise.
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