undercoverangel

Moderation never worked for me and I tried for years. I drank to get drunk every time, I even hated the taste of alcohol (If somebody made me a cocktail I had to pretend it was good, hate the taste of all alcohol). I could go days without picking up but once I did I wouldn't stop until the booze was gone or I passed out. If I did run out before I got to my "comfort zone", I'd be miserable for the rest of the night. It was a hellish way of life, I'm So tired of thinking about alcohol every day!! I didn't need it for the first 40 years of my life, how could I possibly need it now?! I don't, it's all an illusion, and I need to just put it behind me. The way I think about people who can drink moderately? They aren't getting the incredible high I did from it, it affects them differently, reason they don't get addicted. My thoughts anyway.