Rose
Your son sounds just like my nephew. My sister and her husband split - he was a bully and voilent to both my sister and the kids. My nephew also took control of the garage - a domain which had been his father's. He also treated my sister like rubbish - in fact the same way his father had done. He is now 19 and still has an aura of entitlement, expects my sister to pay for his driving fines and just yesterday said that good parents should give their kids the deposit for their first home!! He is also completely horrid to any boyfriend my sister has and has broken up many romances. I truly wish my sister had your courage - because it is courage. If she had had your courage and stood up for herself I am sure things would be different. She is terrified of him - has had to call the police on several occasions but never follows through and always makes excused for him. I say to her there are always reasons for the way a person behaves but never excuses. Hang in there and continue to do what you are doing.