Escea, the ideal place you moved to at your AH's suggestion reminds of the 2004 movie "The Stepford Wives". The movie is about a top New York TV female executive who specializes in reality TV shows in which women get the better of men, especially wives of their husbands. After a series of shocking events she suffers a nervous breakdown and is moved by her husband from Manhattan to the chic, upper-class and very modern planned community of Stepford, Connecticut. Once there, she makes good friends with another female writer, a recovering alcoholic. Together they notice that the husbands are all very content ... and the wives too, but in a hyperdomestic way. The men spend all their time at the Stepford Men's Club, but expect their wives to be at home all the time, washing laundry, cleaning, and making endless batches of cakes while they wait infinitely patiently for their husbands to come home to be fed. The women all act as though they've been brain-washed and the men just seem to sit around the men's club all day. All is not as perfect as it seems... and the two female friends start to investigate. Her friend undergoes the transformation to the sterotype "brainwashed" blissful wife, and she is left on her own. Stepford has an "ideal"couple. The wife of this "ideal" couple appears as the realtor introducing her to her new house, and the "ideal" husband is the town's mayor. At a town picnic, another woman overdoes at the barn dancing and she sees sparks coming out of her ears but the town's mayor won't allow anyone to call an ambulance. Her husband becomes amazed when another man summons his wife and asks for twenty dollars. This woman sticks her husband's cash card in her mouth and then spits out first the card then twenty one-dollar bills. It ends when she discovers all the other women have been quietly converted into robots, all except the "ideal" wife. She is the brains behind the whole town and that her "ideal" husband is a robot.
This movie states a lot about the relationships between alcoholics and codependents. The exeragations drive home to me about what is right and wrong, good and bad, and safe and unsafe. I hope this synopsis helps you, too.
Hang in there! The Five Levels of Truth-Telling: First, you tell the truth to yourself about yourself. Then you tell the truth to yourself about another. At the third level, you tell the truth about yourself to another. Then you tell your truth about another to that other. And finally, you tell the truth to everyone about everything. (Neale Donald Walsch Conversations with God (Book 2))
We tell lies when we are afraid….afraid of what we don’t know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us. But every time we tell a lie, the thing that we fear grows stronger. (Tad Williams)
Some people will not tolerate such emotional honesty in communication. They would rather defend their dishonesty on the grounds that it might hurt others. Therefore, having rationalized their phoniness into nobility, they settle for superficial relationships.
Just my personal opinion. Take what you like and leave the rest.
Love and Peace,
Phoenix