Lunaaa,
Glad I saw and read your post this morning! I was contemplating a new post of my own along very similar lines.
I know my son's cash assistance card # and yesterday I looked at his account online. He had made 3 $40 withdrawals of cash since the 1st when funds were deposited. I want to call and ask him about where that money is going, I felt I deserved to know since I am working 2 jobs to get myself out of the financial hole I put myself in for him! I pissed that he's spending money while I'm scrimping and "doing without" just to make ends meet. I had a hard time getting to sleep last night because this kept tumbling around in my brain. I try to keep saying the serenity prayer over and over to keep the thoughts blocked.
But . . . reading your post and the responses has helped me this morning to remember to LET IT GO. After I'm done typing I'll take a moment to pray that God will help me not worry about what he is doing. (Just like Carol Star said "He didn't deserve to have space in my head "rentfree" anymore. He wasn't focused on me". I need to focus on things which will help get me healthy.)
Good Luck