Part of detaching is realising that you have no control over what anyone but you does..your husband included.You will have to hold YOUR boundaries, but you can't make your husband see the light..if he wants to ignore the problem..fine.However, YOU are choosing not to be around the active alcoholic so YOU have control over that,not what your husband says or does.As for the whole bad guy thing..you and I and everyone on here knows your not being the bad guy...the people who are codependant/enablers/sick won't like it, but OH WELL.....