Anything and everything you put before your recovery is in danger of being lost, sometimes forever.
You want to be sober, but you simply don't know how. ...but you know AA is a solution.
You can make up ANY excuse, ANY reason to not go to a meeting, to not work the steps, to not get sober. ...but there is only one reason to go.
This is an easy one my friend b/c you already know the answer.
Kjell