(((WIWorrier))) - I will include your entire family in my prayers. Yes, that includes your son. I was once where he is, and am very grateful that I survived and found recovery. My ex didn't make it.
I do hope that you and your husband can now be on the same page, let your AS deal with his consequences. It has to be hard when you can't see eye-to-eye.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy