Thank you for such a great post!
I also have difficult and predictable dates. At the time, I feel absolutely nothing redeeming about them however I used to think there was some kind of "glory" in the suffering.
Today I feel like these times are a reflection of my depth of experience and I am glad that I am able to feel my feelings fully without them engulfing me. I can accept it and neither make nor more less of it.
This last year one of those dates passed far more easily for me than it has in over a decade. That was okay too.
I know that how ever it comes I will incorporate it and move on as life never stands still.