Originally Posted by
highfunction 
At this point in my life, I have decided not to leave him over this. It might be denial or nativity, but I can't justify leaving a happy relationship because my boyfriend has an illness. This man is wonderful aside from his drinking. I mean, amazzzzing. He even likes cooking!
He does indeed have a disease, but please realize that his continuing to drink is a CHOICE. He is choosing to ignore the dangers and impact that his addiction is having and will have on himself, and on you.
I know what's going through your mind with regard to your relationship: you're thinking that all the good in this man that you've managed to find, amongst all the other not to great catches out there, far outweighs this "small" issue with his drinking. Until his drinking becomes more of a priority, and until you focus more and more of your time and energy on "managing" his drinking...perhaps hiding it from your friends and family, perhaps talking to him, showing him literature, arguing with him,...yelling at him, having fights with him, crying...
You're probably thinking.."what? No! That'll never happen to us! Not to US! Not to me!"...And yet, you don't really know, do you? He's 33 now, young and relatively healthy. The booze hasn't affected his health *yet*. But I'll bet you 100$ that his acid reflux gets worse over the years, and that other digestive problems crop up as well. My XH has constant diarrhea, indigestion, heartburn...I don't know what he's got now.
In truth, I had no idea what I was up against when I married this man. Sure I knew about "alcoholism" and there was some in my family, but I have No. Friggin. Clue. what it was like to live with an alcoholic...and to have a child with one.
But anyway, I know you've made up your mind to "stand by your man". I made that decision too, a bunch of times over.
I do hope you keep coming back here for support and to further learn about addiction. SR is always open.