Brantskate
You have replied to a post from 2001, probably from the archives, but your concerns are still relevant.
My suggestion would be counselling for yourself. If you have become physically abusive then something is spinning you out of control and I pray you will get help before someone gets badly hurt.
If he is active in his addiction and you feel a need to drink, then my feeling is that this situation is not going to get better any time soon.
Perhaps just take a big step back, decide if your drinking is part of the problem, and then take positive action to do something about it.
Hugs
Ann