Chicory, your response really spoke to me. In fact, everything you said is what new guy says to me. He keeps saying how hard on myself I am.. and it makes me even more scared he will run, because I'm not a confident woman... Either way, I'm so not ready for anyone. He's sooo different. When I spoke to him, I braced myself. I was waiting for him to attack me, call me names, manipulate me.. He did none of that. He listened to me, he told me he was sorry I felt that way and he had no intentions of hurting me. He said he wasn't there to judge me. WHAT THE HECK? That's sooo unusual for me. I am afraid I will ruin any chance at a healthy relationship, because I have no idea how to stop being so hard on myself. God, thank you for understanding me..
L2L, as I was saying.. I just don't know how to maintain some idea of a long-term goal. I mean, I love psychology and I love finances. Those are my two passions... But, I do not feel I will be able to succeed in either field. Not too mention, my brain is always so fuzzy. I cannot focus, and I'm always SO tired. I just lose control too often. I feel so helpless.. I feel like I'm fooling myself if I even imagine what could become of me.. then, I'll just let myself down.
Thanks for letting me vent. I needed to get this out SO badly.