I really appreciate everyone sharing. It's great to hear from so many different people. I posted a rather long reply earlier, so I'll keep it short, but I read part of a book called When Your Lover is a Liar and it helped me a lot, even just reading part of it. It focuses in on that specific experience of being lied to (whether it's infidelity or addiction etc.) and gives tools for how to sort through your feelings and crazy thoughts. I'm reading that and Surviving the Affair. So far so good! God bless everyone here.