Bdiddy, you are doing the work, taking the actions to remain sober and to survive and thrive in sobriety.
As I just did step four, once more, this time it was different. The time leading up to and surrounding this step was an emotional roller coaster. As well it should have been, looking at my past actions and feelings while drinking were "toxic" to me.
I truly realize that while drinking they were things I felt, said or did while active. However, that isn't "ME", anymore.
How wonderfully freeing that is!