Hey Bloomfield,
Around here or at any AA meeting for that matter, you're going to hear plenty of similar stories. The angry, drunk e-mails - done that. Not knowing how to explain a drinking problem - it's not easy for anyone.
I do AA, and I think there's one very rudimentary part to the steps that I think is good advice for anyone. The steps start by grounding yourself in something that keeps you stable. When you get to that, then it's time to go back and look at things that went wrong and how they may be fixed.
I know some may really disagree with me, but if you did happen to find a meeting that you liked, just go and give and get what you need. I know in my city all you have to do to participate is not want to drink (and, common sense, respect that others may be doing formal step work.) I think it would be good to try a few and see if there's a crowd you click with.
-Isaiah