Yep,
I miss the false feeling of confidence, and assuredness it gave me too. It took sobriety to make me realize that I had let so many things, projects, relationship issues, and just plain personal introspection lapse for so long. Sober it becomes clear that I simply lost my edge for a lot of years. Now I have to stop coasting and get back out and actually get things done. For a decade or so I coasted on my past and didn't take care of every day. Facing up to the fact that I am not the man I was, can be a real downer. Facing up to me and reality has rocked me back on my heels almost daily. I am learning to be patient with myself and my longer term withdrawal symptoms and nervous energy. It isn't easy, it can be fear filled occasionally, but that is what it takes. Just because it is worth the end results in the long term, doesn't make the shorter term any easier. Some days it is one step forward and two back, and more and more it is two forward and one back.