I have constructive thoughts to offer, but first I'll say that I, too, have a child with emotional/behavioral issues. He is 9, has been in therapy for three years and is now (finally,) on medication. His present dx is anxiety and depression.
Acknowledging that God is manifest in every situation does not mean that you sit back and wait to see what God will do. It means that you actively participate and seek to follow God's will. It is erroneous to think that you can control your daughter's behavior. You can only control your response to it. You have the responsibility to discipline her and to love her, but you cannot and will not control her. Giving her consequences and guidance does not go against what God expects of parents, but worrying yourself sick is going to make you less effective as a role model.
When you say you "can't" turn this situation over to God, I read it as you "won't" do so. In my case, I decided that God was a much better problem solver than I, and I have endeavored at all times to discern His will and implement it in my son's life. Have I met with obstacles and self doubt? You bet! At times I am tempted to want to take over and do what I think is best. Once you lay it at the feet of God the struggle is to not pick it back up again.
Do not let your daughter go, but continually point her toward God's will. Pray for her. I had a revelation a few months ago that I would personally take responsibility for my son's mental health problems. What I mean is that I choose to see this as an opportunity for me to weed out the sin in my life, to grow closer to God, to become a non-anxious presence in my son's life by opening myself up to God. No, I did not cause his problems and there is no fault to be placed. But as his parent, as an adult, as his spiritual guide, as his teacher, I choose to make his problem mine. I seek to find God's will for his healing and for mine. I consider all selfishness and anger on my part to be sinful attitudes that destroy my ability to really listen to God. I'm no where near where I want to be in this regard, and my son still struggles, but I do have a goal.
You're a good mom. Keep it up!