I am also agnostic. But I also am a firm believer in taking responsibility for things and being the one to steady myself, not turn to a god or others. I'm about empowerment and being responsible for my own choices, not god.
I have the power to make better choices and I've made bad choices as well. The addict/drinker in my life, yes I am powerless over his illness and what he does. But I need to control my own impulses and obsessions, not leave it to some higher power. That is just how I see it.
12-step programs work for many but not for all whether that is AA or al-anon. Except I do take the general principles to heart esp 'take what you like and leave the rest'. I do leave a lot of it but take away that which I can apply to my own life. The concept of Higher Self is how I also approach it.