Oh I'm so sorry to hear you slipped. I know it is so crushing! You've always stood out to me. The place wouldn't be the same without you. We need you as part of our inspiration when you finally kick this for good (I know you can do it!).
Some people can wake up and never drink again. A lot of us try and fail. What helped me to keep getting up again was the memory of how wonderful I felt when I was sober (not just dry, but sober). I never stayed sober when all I was doing was trying to scare myself out of drinking. I had to truly understand that life without alcohol was going to be incredible and the only way to stay there was to permanently remove alcohol from my list of viable options. Forever. Not 'one day at a time'. FOREVER. Yes, sometimes I have to hang on for a day and talk myself down until the next day. But that 'forever' cinched it for me. Put me in a place of confidence.
to you as you navigate your own path.