There is nothing like a fresh start, Live! I am looking forwar to a new place, a new home, and new faces---no bad memories there, just great ones waiting to be made!
And brokenheart, I am more than resigned--and relieved, too. I have given the relationship and marriage umpteen bajillion chances, and my STBXAH never disappointed in his ability to disappoint. I stuck by him through alot of trials and tribulations, waiting for that better day to come, despite evidence to the contrary again and again and again. It isn't going to come---even if he stops drinking. He has been showing me, since the beginning, that I will never come before addiction, lies or deceit. I said I would give it one more shot, and he did stop drinking. But he is still an addict, and still has the addict's way of lies and secrecy.
Life is too short. Soooooo short! I want to be happy, and attract good things. Can't do that while I try to hang onto something that is poisoning me. Actions are truth. His actions are telling me that he will always protect his addictions, and lie to do so. So I will beleive him. Without truth, there is nothing. And if I live a lie, then I lose myself. I was starting to feel as if I was fading away, just a general numbness. When he is gone, I can breathe again. I feel hope. It feels like a dark presence is gone from my household.