Thank you, folks.
The good news is, I never fully bought back into our reconciliation, so after the initial sting, I'm back on my own path, looking forward to big plans, including a move across the country as soon as I can sell my place. I'm looking forward to putting thousands of miles between me and the STBXAH, let me tell you.
I think my addict is addicted to female attention, too. He's got a good voice, and loves going to karaoke bars to get positive strokes for his singing. While we were apart, I heard from various sources that he was acting like quite the fool at gigs with his band, trying to pick up any female that would have him. (none did, as his drunken behaviour was off the charts) I also recall a rather bountiful porn collection I discovered a year into our relationship as well---which he swore he was no longer into. I'm pretty sure it is only a matter of time before he gets back into that again, too, full throttle.
His brain is a dark and twisted place, and it is becoming clear to me how badly I was manipulated during our relationship. I also recently learned that he was trashing me to his ex whenever we had issues, so add gross disloyalty to the mix and there's a situation I am MORE than happy to be free of!
Addictions can be conquered, character flaws not so much.