A good cry is a good place to start. Let out some of that anxiety and upset.
Not being able to get in touch with a loved one especially one you feel certain is doing something harmful to themselves is gut wrenching. I've been in that frenzy myself.
When I started letting those feelings out, they stopped having such a hold on me. I was no longer paralyzed and wondering what if this or what if that. Focusing on how I was feeling and what I could do to alleviate those feelings for myself made a big difference.
I started sharing here, reading, and working the steps of Al-Anon. I put a voice to the feelings I was ashamed to express to family and friends and started revealing the truth about my situation.
It's been a long road, but as they say every journey begins with the first step, and I am so grateful I took it.
You've take a step to seek some answers. Keep reading. Keep posting. Keep asking those questions and the answers will reveal themselves.
Welcome!!
Alice