No, thank you so much. I need people to give me advice and tell me how it is. Ive been so blinded by my love for him that I have absolutely no idea how to handle myself without him. He is completely manipulative. I feel like because of my resentments towards him about lying to me for so long, I wasn't the best girlfriend I could have been. That is my own fault for not dealing with my emotions directly. However, I gave my heart and essentially my life to him for so long and I don't know how to completely let go. For the past 6 months I feel like Ive been in a bad dream, and I am going to wake up and everything is just going to go back to the way it was. I feel like i gave my heart to someone who numbed his feelings with drugs, so he could never give it back, but I just dont know how to get mine back.