Yesterday I went and hung out with some friends that were drinking. I have some relapses, but I am no stranger with not drinking and hanging out with people who are drinking. I told my sponser I felt crappy at the end of the day. He said that going back into a situation like that without completing a program is like boxing a nemisis without behing about to throw a punch. Of course I am going to feel not "spiritually filled" I didn't drink, but until I am sober and working a program for awhile, I am just going to grin and bare it.