Daytrader - Your post is full of wonderful insight and I appreciate it. This especially:
Sure, my circumstances were different and there are/were a lot of differences in my story vs theirs.......but the main things were the same: When I started I craved more, when I stopped I couldn't stay stopped and even when I could stay stopped, life still sucked. Those three add up to alcoholism and the BB addresses them directly: physical craving, mental obsession and spiritual malady.
...and the more I read in Under the Influence, the more I understand how the body adapts to long-term use of alcohol and the associated mind tricks it plays. Most interestingly I now understand that by the time a person exhibits "typical" alcoholic behaviors they have long since become addicted to alcohol. In other words DENIAL is an integral aspect of the disease....and a deadly Catch-22.
I'm so glad I started this thread. These thoughts had been bouncing around in my head all week and now I am resolved to move forward. YAY!
I did go to a meeting last night--a speaker meeting. No, I couldn't relate to her story for the most part--she has suffered greatly as a result of her drinking/drugging--but I was there to support and love her through her difficult speech, and most importantly to celebrate her 2 years clean. It was a good night.
Thank you all.