I feel for you. I went through this exact same thing with my ex, except that he was married to 'her'. It was absolutely ridiculous how he abdicated his role as parent to his new wife..and she gladly took it on because that gave her the control she craved. It took me TWO YEARS of bitching, nagging, and standing my ground to make them understand that HE is the parent and when there is an issue to discuss about our children then I will DISCUSS IT WITH HIM ONLY...which put an end to emails. Yes, she was even writing his emails for him. We spoke only by telephone. She was some kinda pissed off -- and he was too, for awhile -- but I never backed down. Never.